Margaret Rowley Kerr

Mother had a wonderful attitude about life. She was a doer, not a complainer, and not a joiner of religious or women’s groups. She had a gift for having social fun and developed lifelong friends during her school days in South Pasadena. She went to UCLA, planning to become a librarian. This plan was interrupted when Dad, her high school boyfriend, decided to go to college in Illinois, so she went along as his wife. They had a remarkably happy marriage, being thoroughly supportive of each other. I don’t think they ever had an argument. Mom devoted herself to being a housewife and mother. She even remarked that she felt sorry for men in the role they had to play as providers for their families because of the pressure it put on them.

Her role as family manager ranged over responsibilities that impacted her life in many ways:

·  She managed our day-to-day finances, economizing wherever possible. Once she even sent me along with Dad when she knew he was going shopping for a birthday gift for her. She told me to talk him out of anything expensive. During WW II when food was rationed, she figured out how to make the most of our food stamps. She even made a deal with the local butcher to save something decent for our family every week.  

·  She was fundamental to Bob and my needs as we grew up. This included special demands such as my frequent colds through age 7. I would be home in bed for up to two weeks at a time, restricting her ability to get out of the house.

·  During the 1940s we only had one automobile so she drove Dad to and from work. When we moved from Troon Avenue to Brentwood my last semester of high school, Mom sacrificed the use of her car so I could drive it to finish at Hamilton High School.

·  When I separated from Tom Greene, she said that no marriage was better than a bad one and welcomed me home with my two infants, Marcelle and Colin.  She was a totally devoted grandma, showering them with love and care over the years.

·  Mom and her sister Edith devoted total support to their mother Olive in her later years. Mom also gave much support to Dad’s father’s sister, Jessie Betts.  

·  Mom prepared our family meals but was not much interested in cooking. She tended to have the same meals week after week. She did enjoy gardening and garden design. During WW II she planted an entire vegetable garden on Troon. Also, she created a rose garden the length of the front driveway. At Walther Way she planted the entire back garden and created a lovely interior front garden on Vista Caudal.

Mom lived another 20 years after Dad’s early death. She was not eligible for the retirement package she and Dad had hoped for from Douglas Aircraft because he did not work there quite the required length of time. She made some financial adjustments and managed comfortably. She had a good social life in her neighborhood and even traveled with Peggy Halitsky to places like Russia and China. She did not show her age much as the years passed. She even did a little two-step dance at her 80th birthday celebration. As Larry Graven noted about her heart attack just short of 82, she cheated the medical care establishment.

Grandma used a signal when she wanted to talk on the phone: she would ring the home line in South Pasadena once and hang up, then wait for someone in the family to call her back. This was cheaper in those days of long-distance calling. I was excited to hear the signal and had her phone number memorized. She was a huge part of our lives growing up. I'd guess Grandma made half my wardrobe from kindergarten through high school. My mom and I would shop for fabric and patterns, then turn them over to Grandma to watch dresses and skirts materialize in her skilled hands. Her sewing machine was in a room with a map of the world marking all the places she and my grandfather had visited. I used to study it and the travel photos that covered one wall and ask her about them while she sewed. I am certain my fascination with travel started in that room. Grandma gave me her old Singer sewing machine and the sewing box that I still use today. She also taught me to needlepoint and knit, and we spent many comfortable hours in her living room doing needlework and chatting, watching The Lawrence Welk Show, or other variety shows -- anything except Bob Hope, because she couldn't stand how he'd look around after a joke with his "little beady eyes." Visiting her in Newport Beach was marvelous -- we'd walk around Balboa Island, ride the ferry, play in the Fun Zone. I could not have felt more loved or engaged in life than I did at those times. I am so grateful I spent a weekend like that with her just two weeks before she died suddenly of a heart attack. She had just had her hair done and was driving home, when she felt the attack and pulled over to notify a passing jogger. She would have been pleased. The last thing she wanted was to go into a nursing home or linger with disease. She was a class act right to the end.